Feelings of trust and faith can sometimes pop up at the most unusual moments and interesting places. I discovered this recently in my car.
Last week I drove four hundred miles round trip to see some friends in Maryland. The route I took is what I call the “Pennsylvania Turnpike Speedway” because that is exactly what it feels like. Heavily laden with trucks and cars, this road transverses through the Pennsylvania countryside complete with mountains, s-curves and one long tunnel. The scenery is beautiful, if you are the passenger, but as the driver your main attention needs to be on the road and the other drivers. You can, however, still enjoy the landscape as you keep your eyes on the road and your hands upon the wheel. (Thank you Jim Morrison.)
On the return trip I started to have a different perspective about the turnpike. I started to think of it as the highway of life, filled with different types of people and experiences. And like life, you need to trust and have faith that everyone will do their part to help others. As I passed a truck, I had faith that he was a capable driver and trusted that he would stay in his lane. When I started to become a little nervous about a curve, I had faith in my ability and trusted my experience in maneuvering my car. These thoughts made the trip more pleasant.
I think I am a very good driver and do not want to paint a picture that I was a nervous wreck while driving – just cautious. And just like in the highway of life I have practices that I use to keep myself calm and relaxed in each situation. Deep breathing, music, and meditation are my best tools for this. This new way of thinking about trust and faith are now also in my stress-reduction toolbox.
I invite you to look at new ways where you can think about faith and trust for security and happiness in your life. See where your own highway of life can benefit from these new thought patterns. And remember to enjoy the scenery along the way.
Smiles,
Jeanette
“Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.”
Stephen Covey
Category: Stress Management
Smile, Even When There is Not a Camera
Yesterday I was reminded of the importance of a smile, even if just for me. This all started when I decided to go to the grocery store. I was excited about shopping for healthy food choices for the week because I had not done any major shopping for awhile. This excitement changed once I got in the store and was reminded that it was a Monday, the day for restocking shelves and replenishing home supplies after the weekend. It was busy. The rainy day was also making it a destination place, adding to the blocked aisles.
I felt myself getting irritated, but then I smiled. Yes, I was wearing my mask, but I still smiled. The irritation I started to feel cued me to smile, and I immediately felt better. Instead of being miffed over the busyness in the store, I reminded myself to be grateful that I was able to be out and about in the store and that I could afford to shop for what I wanted. My smile led to a deep relaxing breath and away I went to fill my cart.
The reminder to smile actually started that morning during my reading. I came across the quote “…meet life head on with a smile.” It led me to think deeper about the value of a smile and the happiness it can bring. It brought up memories of my mother telling me to always smile and show my teeth, “It makes you look so much prettier”. If a smile can lead to a pretty attitude, then I am all for it.
Smiling and humor also has health benefits: improved mood, pain relief, lowered blood pressure, stronger immune systems, stress reliever, better relationships, and a younger appearance.
I spent the next hour in the grocery store smiling. And even if other shoppers could not see my smile, I know they could see the twinkle reflected in my eyes. Especially at the checkout counter when I saw the bill. Of course, I was smiling, twinkling, and having a nice conversation with the check-out lady, appreciative for the items I was able to purchase. I hope you find and share your smile today.
Smiles,
Jeanette
“Use your smile to change the world, don’t let the world change your smile.”
Chinese Proverb
Cultivating Happiness Now
There are times when my mind wanders to the thought “I can’t stand these restrictions and will be happy when this pandemic crisis is over.” I am sure you also have had thoughts like this or maybe even worse.
When I focus on this thought it makes me feel icky, alone, trapped, frustrated, and stuck. I have put conditions on my happiness; I cannot be happy unless everything is in perfect order.
I am fortunate that I do not have a physical job to go to, but I do have work that I desire to do and share. I want to make connections, I want to create content and programs, and I want to inspire others to lead energized and creative lives. If allowed, my thoughts of negativity and despair would prevent me from doing the work that I love.
There is a saying I embrace, “What you think about comes about”. This means if you focus on the negative you will not be open to positive opportunities and more negative and challenging situations will be thrown in front of you. Feelings of happiness will elude you.
The pandemic is real. We all want it to go away. We can do our part by listening to public health guidelines, wearing masks, washing hands and social distancing. We can also cultivate our own happiness right now regardless of the circumstances. This will help decreases stress, raise resiliency, and helps us help others.
I have found that I am in control. I can harness more positive thoughts and I can create a supportive environment. Here are some practices that help me cultivate my happiness:
I have a morning routine of reading something inspiring, journaling, and meditating. When I begin my day this way, I always feel energized and positive about how my day will unfold.
I get outside at least once a day for a nice walk or hike. The fresh air and seeing nature invigorates my spirit and tames any negative thoughts, replacing them with inspiring and creative ideas.
When I feel rushed and stressed, even in my house, I consciously slow myself down and concentrate on the task at hand. This mindfulness exercise of being in the present moment relaxes me and helps me appreciate my life. You cannot think a negative thought while focusing on something positive.
I find time to do things that I enjoy like reading, painting, gardening, and cooking a great meal.
When I have an unpleasant thought, I take a deep breath, I acknowledge the thought and the feeling, then I make a conscious choice to replace it with a more positive thought or perspective. I do not dwell on the negative because it only gives it more power to grow and fester.
There are times I feel frustrated and think things like “My house is too small and noisy. I cannot get my writing finished!” I fix this by having conversations with Phil about the importance of my quiet time, I set boundaries and I use a headset with music.
And last, but probably the most important practice, is that at the end of the day I think of the good things in my life. I am grateful for a warm house, food, fur babies that love me and a partner that keeps me entertained. Showing gratitude brings more things into my life to be grateful for and adds to my happiness.
I am not perfect, but each day I get better at making choices for my actions and my thoughts that support a happy life. I hope the pandemic gets under control soon. Regardless, I will be cultivating my happiness and I hope you will find ways to cultivate yours too.
Stay safe, healthy, and happy.
Jeanette